Brown Skin Lady

Brown Skin Lady.

Tuesday, December 27, 2005

There were plenty of attractions to bring out racegoers. There had been no racing on this circuit for one week, there had been no grass racing in Southern California for seven weeks, most people had the day off for a holiday, the race card - featuring the Malibu - was outstanding, and Santa Anita gave away its popular wall calendar, a tradition on opening day. After the fourth race, a Budweiser hitch of Clydesdales made a promenade down the stretch, pulling a red wagon.

The parking lot on the clubhouse turn filled up before the second race, causing late arrivers to be redirected to a lot on the backstretch.

There was a festive atmosphere in the stands, where friends caught up with one another following the weekend holidays. Some of the passageways on the mezzanine level were congested, and long lines gathered at a clubhouse sandwich stand from which wafted the smell of corned beef. Mariachi bands and dancers in colorful, Mexican-themed dress strolled the grounds. And the soothing tones of track commentator Trevor Denman emanated from the loudspeakers. No one could deny it was good to be back.

This includes me, my brother-in-law, my niece, my nephew (who are both 5 and 4 repspectively.) , the exacta, the trifecta, and the superfecta I hit on race 6.

That's right! EXACTA, TRIFECTA, and SUPERFECTA in ONE race!

Not that any of you actually know what those terms mean, let alone even care about thoroughbred racing.

Which just means I will continue to blog about SP1200's, recursively defined sequences, and Grade I stakes races.

I will now buy myself a Kentucky Derby Package.

andycat stayed in the red at 11:32 PM

Monday, December 26, 2005

"The Mission," from my main man, Special Ed.

Oh, shit! I said/ Hold up/ Wait!

This is one of my Top Ten Favorites of All Time. My top ten list is about 600 songs long, but still. Forget Wu-Tang, this song is a comic book come to life: The Rambo knife/ With the hunting apparel.

It's cold that Ed shoots the girl he's kicking it with, but when he says, Sorry, baby, but I gotta do what I gotta, well, I can hear that part over and over (Go ahead and slap me now, for being a lax feminist).

AND! The line, over the James Bond licks--This is a mission/ Not a small time thing—

That’s it! I’m laser-printing that out in a fly font and tacking it right above my white board for all my students to see. Something about that line which keeps me UP, if you know what I mean. Simple, yet engaging.

People sleep on Ed. He's mad authentic (to an Upland Kid), straight, as he puts it, Flatbush-style. LOVE THIS SONG. I listen to it over and over. And over.

andycat stayed in the red at 10:00 PM

Wednesday, December 21, 2005

An Open Letter to Times New Roman,

Dear Times New Roman,

Why must you be the default font for every single letter, credit card app, memo, and term paper ever written? I feel that you are aesthetically limiting to word documents everywhere. Yeah, you were cool in 4th grade when I wrote my Christopher Columbus report and Mrs. Squires showed off to the class that I had typed my paper while the rest of classmates wrote theirs in messy non-legible cursive.

But that was 1988, 17 years ago when laser printers were about as novel as Where the Red Fern Grows. So in those 17 years I want to meet the person who designated you as “Standard” for manuscripts in offices worldwide. And don’t think for once that I’ve forgotten about your cousin, Arial, who herself is dull and boring.

You’re old, you’re out of style, you’re uncool like Wide Receivers who still rock the blocky 80’s. You notice how the new crop of Wide Receivers wear numbers in the teens and they just look, well, sleek?

Well take a clue and ask Gil Sans MT about his steez.

andycat stayed in the red at 12:31 AM

Monday, December 19, 2005

burntpancakes: this is what happens when a homie quitting his job is kicking it online with another homie who is on break

ANDYDOAN1: i say we all pool our money together
ANDYDOAN1: and buy a 12 room mansion
ucsbcub1: and live like entorage
ucsbcub1: i am just mad we dont have a famous friend
ANDYDOAN1: and have it filmed.
ucsbcub1: yeah people would watch us
ucsbcub1: we are funny
ANDYDOAN1: it would be complete nonsense
ucsbcub1: people from the midwest
ANDYDOAN1: connor looking at himself
ucsbcub1: would loooove it
ANDYDOAN1: i mean if you think about it
ANDYDOAN1: we're all really diverse
ucsbcub1: yep
ucsbcub1: and if dave was in on it
ucsbcub1: then it would for sure succeed
ANDYDOAN1: a mexican, a jew, a filipino who's white but thinks he's asian, an asian, an indian, we need some black folks
ucsbcub1: there would be a lot of awkward relationships going around
ucsbcub1: dave and his married girl
ANDYDOAN1: connor and his white girl
ANDYDOAN1: me and a white girl
ANDYDOAN1: we would just make fun of white girls
ucsbcub1: yeah it would be outlandish
ucsbcub1: the difference between us
ucsbcub1: and all the other rediculous people on mtv
ucsbcub1: is that they did something
ucsbcub1: we just talk
ucsbcub1: fear is the only thing keeping us from fame
ucsbcub1: and riches
ucsbcub1: and bitches and hoes
ucsbcub1: cuz that is really what it is all about
ucsbcub1: bitches
ucsbcub1: and hoes

andycat stayed in the red at 12:29 PM

Sunday, December 18, 2005

Because he's got the whole amazon.com thing going...and he works 27 hours a day...and homie turned 26 on Saturday...I think it's time for a:

DAVE WEINER APPRECIATION POST

I will admit, Level One/ Fresca has got me feeling a bit complimentary (like angles), so you know and I know the truth is about to come forward.

DW in five words:

Tenacious. Reliable. Kettle One and Grey Goose. Axapta, Bike-Alog, Giant Bicycles. Built to be ridden. I think this is more than five words.

All i gotta say is:

Daniel Filion "New Axapta user" (Canada)...you and your one star can lick my armpit.

Whatever man.

I think this is a great read. Keep on, keep keepin on.

Happy 26th.

andycat stayed in the red at 9:38 PM

Blue Monster

Ok. Check the batting order.

1. Furcalcohol and his 95 steals : 1 DUI ratio.
2. Mueller Time
3. JD Drew
4. Pornstache.
5. ~~Mia~~ Nomar
6. Cruz Jr.
7. Navarro
8. Whoever's playing left field. Reggie Sanders. Please, Reggie Sanders.

So when Nomar goes down around May 5th with a sprained knee, Hee-Seop will man 1st. And when JD Drew goes down around June 2nd, Repko will patrol center. And once Cesar comes back, Little will just pull the left fielder out and plug Cesar right next to Furcal in the infield.

Kinda like how goalies are pulled in close games in Hockey.

Oh wait.

2 Mill in incentives for Nomar. Hmmm...Incentives?
550+ At bats. (500,000)

150+ games. (200,000)

Make sure to be the DD when hitting the Downtown Standard after games and Furcal hands you a Negro Modelo. (1,000,000)

Never hand Kent a copy of Women's Soccer Digest during pre-game warmups when he already has a copy of Motocross Magazine in his hand. (300,000)

andycat stayed in the red at 7:04 AM

Wednesday, December 14, 2005

acat, and I'm ready to work it out. Giving thanks, respect, and love to the architects of this beautiful world of mine:

To iTunes, for providing the source of music while i write this and freeing me into a deep sound abyss.

To De La Soul, because Pos-d-nous helps the necks get loose.

To the transformer scratch, the best type of cut.

To hardwood floors, for providing solid foundation to bachelor pad's everywhere.

To Tums, for never ceasing to amaze me with its quick acting acid indigestion relief.

To Yoshinoya, for feeding me three times in the past week.

To the Lakers, for going 5-1 on the roadtrip and giving Kwa-mizzay doubtfuls some sort of hope.

To the Dodgers, Ned Colletti, because Mueller, Furcal, Izturis, and Kent is a solid infield. (Although I will miss the Big Korean and the Little Mexican.)

To intertops.com, for netting me $300+ dollars in the past month.

To powerpoint, because I am the king of PowerPoint.

To complexity, for influencing me to strive towards simplicity.

To cleavage, because who don't like it?

To Algebra 2, for confusing the living crap-ola out of many high school students yet providing me fascinating views on exponential lines of best fit.

And to Math Teachers everywhere...because we can use lines like...

Hey Darling, I'll talk nerdy to you.

andycat stayed in the red at 11:23 PM

Monday, December 12, 2005

Are you a blogger?

*Looks at blogger shirt*. Why, yes. Are you?

Yes. I'm on xanga.

I'm on blogspot.

*Insert nerd alert here.*

And so with my new address came a new barber, as her and I swapped blog addresses.

Hope she's reading this, because I think she's fly.

Or maybe I just get another haircut in 2 days, because alot of people get two haircuts within the span of 5 days, right?

(Spittin at girls through my blog without corresponding feelings of shame indicate that my blog may, in fact, be indestructible.)

andycat stayed in the red at 9:28 PM

Saturday, December 10, 2005

5 o'clock on a saturday morning. Because I always wake up at this time.

So everybody wants an update on my life?
Parents -- Separated.
Mom -- Has a feeding tube.
Location -- Moved to Culver City with the White Russian.
Status -- Single and ready to get it started.
Job -- Suprisingly engaging.

Which leads me to work. I've been working a ton of hours. And for the first time since initially making the decision to enter the teaching profession, I actually seem to be enjoying it.

(Also, I enjoy having to not explain my job description when meeting somebody. Everybody loves a high school math teacher.)

Could be a welcome distraction to the other dysfunctionalities going on in my life. Could be that, just maybe, I'm improving my craft. Perhaps the words that are coming out of my mouth are truly manifesting.

I shouldn't analyze it to the core, but I will say that I enjoy working in South Central. And after a few years of teaching Blacks and Mexicans, I also enjoy working with students of color.

Many times, I feel like my students need me.

And I like that feeling.
Because when you need, you appreciate.
And when you appreciate, you love.

And really, we all want to feel worthy of love.

andycat stayed in the red at 4:58 AM

Tuesday, December 06, 2005

Being that most of my readers are college graduates, find the equations of the above graphs.

(I know my sophomores can.)

andycat stayed in the red at 3:26 PM